dirty martini

old music for new people

dance yourself dizzy June 1, 2008

 

the george sampson backlash has started already. i’m not usually in favour of kids but this is not your average brat. those who have labelled him a chav are disgusting – vilifying children, or in fact adults, who dare to appreciate anything other than dull plodding indie and rock music is pathetic.

this kid deserves to win britain’s got talent, and anyone griping about the other acts being more deserving are missing the point. this is a cash prize and a chance to leverage the exposure of being on tv. once. at the royal variety which no one has watch in 15 years.

i would not have wanted another singing act to win. why is it the uk is so bothered about opera all of a sudden? i’m an operatic x factor would die on its arse. that andrew johnston kid that played the bullying card was annoying and did not take defeat well (which i enjoyed). faryl is not 12. i liked paul potts last year but we’re still suckers for nessun dorma 18 years after that world cup, aren’t we?

and for the money aspect, i would not have liked buck toothed escala to do well. they don’t need the cash  -clearly that brunette can just ask daddy to pay for her much needed nose job. 100k would not have bought that dog girl a personality.

any of the others i would have been pleased for. i loved nemisis although next year i would so love to see dance acts that do not employ any of the following: masks, robotics, identical costumes, anyone under 13, irish music, ‘it’s like that’ and any theme whatsoever. themes are limiting and the rocky horror show was crap the first time round. those cheeky monkey kids were demonic.

oh – now that mrs o has gravitated stateside, can we get the hoff over here to replace piers next year? ta.

bgt – the first two years …

george sampson

nemisis

flava

bar wizards

tony laf

paul potts

 

new edition – the beginning April 24, 2007

you only have to say their name and ladies of a certain age melt. as noted by kanye west in ‘slow jamz‘, girl needs to hear some new edition if you’re planning to get lucky tonight.bobby brown, ralph tresvant, michael bivins, ronnie devoe, rickey bell, and later johnny gill, gave an entire generation of girls a standard of boyfriend to aspire to. before they wound up with broke ass players ten years later. how big were they? madonna was their support act on tour in 1983. they appeared in ‘knightrider‘ with the hoff.

their first single, ‘candy girl’ was my first ever record in 1983. a shout out to seven year old girls everywhere, we rejoiced as finally there seemed to exist boys who understood how we wanted to be treated.

whilst our infant school nemeses pulled up our skirts, yanked our hair and made us pretend to be princess leia, minus gold bikini, new edition made it clear they were up for playing kiss chase.

sadly boys grow up more quickly than you think. After two great albums, bobby brown left due to behavioural issues (cough) and started his solo career in 1986. johnny gill replaced him and the next two albums were lacklustre.

then, they found their groove at the turn of the 80s on the burgeoning new jack scene with ‘heart break’. due to contractual obligations leaving them an album short of their agreement with mca, they reunited in 1996 as grown men, and their 2008 regroup as thirtysomethings is imminent. not so much a comeback as a ten year reunion.

no matter how old they or I get – I’ll always be their candy girl.

ten sugary sweet new edition classicsdownload here

candy girl
the one that started it all complete with sonic whooshes, bleeps and tambourines.

popcorn love
the follow-up, not nearly as successful, but classic. get the feeling the boys liked their junk food?

cool it now
their only real low point as a band has been letting amish casualwear sweatshop gap use this 1984 hit in one of their insufferably smug adverts.

mr telephone man
smooth 80s boy soul at its best. nice use of late 70s wah wah sound. there are no words to describe how much i loved this song.

my secret
1985 hit from their second and best album ‘new edition’. ‘ooh! sparks begin to fly, lightning in the sky…’

leaving you again
recently sampled for ciara and bow wow‘s ‘like you’….took me ages to recognise where it came from.

delicious
surprisingly mature effort from 1985 ‘new edition’ album. was covered in the 90s by british soulsters don-e and deni hines.

can you stand the rain
lush ballad from ‘heart break’ with johnny gill on lead vocals.

crucial
uptempo hit from ‘heart break’ that showcased the boys transition into new jack swing dons.

hit me off
the lead single from the 1996 comeback. slotted effortlessly into the mid 90s bumpy r&b scene.