dirty martini

old music for new people

90s girls: the remixes December 24, 2008

 

suddenly the 90s seem like a long time ago. one more year left of the 00s, how did that happen?

i remember when these girls were ruling the clubs despite not being out of high school. aaliyah would have been the first to celebrate her 30th birthday next month.

download aaliyah remixes

back and forth – uk flavour remix

age ain’t nothin’ but a number – linslee remix with cash rex

if your girl only knew – timbaland remix with missy elliott

hot like fire – timbaland remix with missy elliott

download brandy remixes

i wanna be down – carson ca remix

baby – allstar party mix

best friend – character r&b remix with channel live

top of the world – boogiesoul remix

download monica remixes

don’t take it personal – street tracks remix

like this and like that – k.o remix with c-knowledge

before you walk out my life – pete rock remix

why i love you so much – soulpower remix

 

teenage love affair July 10, 2008

before t’internet, there were magazines. ok there still are magazines but i now buy two per month – heat and glamour – whereas back in the day i used to get about ten.

just seventeen was good for horoscopes and those little free books that taught you to be a total stalker, in a completely non-harmless way of course…’close your eyes and think of a question. stick a pencil down anywhere on the page. find the symbol you land on and the answer will be revealed….’he thinks you’re too good for him’. well, durrrr.

more! was of interest primarily for the problem pages, which went slightly beyond that of the other titles. there was no ‘shoud i kiss him or not?’ boys at school would pore over these pages in great detail, before checking position of the fortnight. ‘oh yeah…done that already.’ ‘who with?’ ‘you don’t know her…i met her on holiday…’

mizz dealt in hardcore compatibility charts. so if you were an aries and you liked a pisces you were basically screwed. question: did anyone actually look a compatibility chart, see that their intended target was suitable and then march up to them at school the next day? no. it made no difference except if he turned you down…’we weren’t compatible anyway, he’s a fucking leo, i can’t be doing with it…’

minx ruled. it dared to take the piss out of gormless celebs like ‘louise out of eternal’ and the spice girls, much to the anger of their PRs, as I remember. i have no idea why it disappeared so suddenly, everyone i knew loved it.

download here

alicia keys – teenage love affair

amazulu – too good to be forgotten

aaliyah – age ain’t nothin’ but a number

beyonce – my first time

chairmen of the board – since there were pigtails

cool notes – you’re never too young

erykah badu – back in the day

hot chocolate – it started with a kiss

ryan leslie – used to be

shanice – i love your smile

sister sledge – frankie

slick rick – teenage love

 

hell is…other people June 16, 2008

well, we’re over a week and one eviction into the latest series.

alex

well, we know which box to put her in don’t we? i don’t even know if she’s trying to be charley or is just a rude bitch. not sure what would be worse.

dale

hmm. he reminds me of the actor in 27 dresses a bit. not sure about him yet. the whole having a crush on someone already thing is a bit desperate. it didn’t work for saskia and maxwell and it won’t work this time.

darnell

i have a feeling darnell is going to be good value, and possibly one of the only housemates brave enough to take on alex.

dennis

bitchy little pinenut akin to sex and the city’s anthony. but nowhere near as redeemable.

jennifer

single mum who supposedly looks like cheryl cole but in all truth, looks more like alanis morissette. there’s a VAST difference.

kathreya

human pokemon and obvious fodder for jlc and alan carr. haven’t heard her talk about anything other than cookies so far.

lisa

is clearly going to have some kind of epiphany relating to her relationship. seems fairly calm but could just be in blind panic from the realisation that her boyfriend is a twat.

luke

his longevity could hinge on how well he copes with pissed up housemates while rolling on in his wagon. hissy fits could ensue.

‘mario’

twat. thinks he looks italian so changes his name from shaun to mario. wtf? this man is every bouncer you have ever hated, every dickhead who has pinched your arse in a crowded bar. torture him or get him out.

mikey

seems very sweet but is being patronised to hell and back by mario and lisa. he’s blind not stupid you fu%!ers.

mohamed

has the potential to be a good housemate if he doesn’t end up winding up the others up by nicking all the food. another one who might stand up to alex.

rachel

former child actress. has five cats so i want to like her. her and jennifer kind of look the same so i don’t see both lasting.

rebecca

same as laura form last year. but not welsh. she’ll be out soon bar an act of immense generosity so don’t pay too much attention to her.

rex

has that max from eastender thing going on. gingers are doing it for themselves this year.

stephanie

thick as, and the least compelling interviewee ever, but i would have preferred to see one of the others go as she had the potential to cause trouble and was allergic to mario.

sylvia

will disassociate herself from alex at the scene of the first big fight. in fact, is there anywhere that will take a bet on that?

download here

aaliyah – don’t know what to tell you

alexander o’neal – fake

colonel abrams – trapped

kelis – game show/about to hate me

living in a box – living in a box

mariah carey – prisoner

marvin gaye – it’s a desperate situation

o’jays – 992 arguments

prince – let’s pretend we’re married

the roots – lazy afternoon

vybe – i can’t fight anymore