dirty martini

old music for new people

hell is…other people June 16, 2008

well, we’re over a week and one eviction into the latest series.

alex

well, we know which box to put her in don’t we? i don’t even know if she’s trying to be charley or is just a rude bitch. not sure what would be worse.

dale

hmm. he reminds me of the actor in 27 dresses a bit. not sure about him yet. the whole having a crush on someone already thing is a bit desperate. it didn’t work for saskia and maxwell and it won’t work this time.

darnell

i have a feeling darnell is going to be good value, and possibly one of the only housemates brave enough to take on alex.

dennis

bitchy little pinenut akin to sex and the city’s anthony. but nowhere near as redeemable.

jennifer

single mum who supposedly looks like cheryl cole but in all truth, looks more like alanis morissette. there’s a VAST difference.

kathreya

human pokemon and obvious fodder for jlc and alan carr. haven’t heard her talk about anything other than cookies so far.

lisa

is clearly going to have some kind of epiphany relating to her relationship. seems fairly calm but could just be in blind panic from the realisation that her boyfriend is a twat.

luke

his longevity could hinge on how well he copes with pissed up housemates while rolling on in his wagon. hissy fits could ensue.

‘mario’

twat. thinks he looks italian so changes his name from shaun to mario. wtf? this man is every bouncer you have ever hated, every dickhead who has pinched your arse in a crowded bar. torture him or get him out.

mikey

seems very sweet but is being patronised to hell and back by mario and lisa. he’s blind not stupid you fu%!ers.

mohamed

has the potential to be a good housemate if he doesn’t end up winding up the others up by nicking all the food. another one who might stand up to alex.

rachel

former child actress. has five cats so i want to like her. her and jennifer kind of look the same so i don’t see both lasting.

rebecca

same as laura form last year. but not welsh. she’ll be out soon bar an act of immense generosity so don’t pay too much attention to her.

rex

has that max from eastender thing going on. gingers are doing it for themselves this year.

stephanie

thick as, and the least compelling interviewee ever, but i would have preferred to see one of the others go as she had the potential to cause trouble and was allergic to mario.

sylvia

will disassociate herself from alex at the scene of the first big fight. in fact, is there anywhere that will take a bet on that?

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aaliyah – don’t know what to tell you

alexander o’neal – fake

colonel abrams – trapped

kelis – game show/about to hate me

living in a box – living in a box

mariah carey – prisoner

marvin gaye – it’s a desperate situation

o’jays – 992 arguments

prince – let’s pretend we’re married

the roots – lazy afternoon

vybe – i can’t fight anymore

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big fish little fish

for those who were too young, think the flashback scene in ‘human traffic’. whistles, vicks, big fish little fish cardboard box.

actually i was too young but on the odd night i managed to sneak out to a rave, at legendary south coast club sterns, with my older boyfriend who had delusions of dj grandeur.

this mix is a nod to the inbetween years – post-acid house but more balearic and trippy than hardcore. when rave wasn’t a dirty word.

this was true warehouse rave. dancing in a field until 6am before that idiotic criminal justice act. the prodigy, autechre and orbital all protested by releasing non-repetitive beats and printed digs at the new law. where is it now?

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final cut – take me away

bug kahn and the plastic jam – made in two minutes

rhythm on the loose – break of dawn

cartouche – feel the groove

turntable hype – set you free

digital boy – gimme a fat beat

cola boy – 7 ways to love

oceanic – insanity

bizz nizz – don’t miss the partyline

adamski – n-r-g

bowa – different story

nomad – i wanna give you devotion

t99 – anasthasia

lfo – lfo

plez – can’t stop

lennie de ice – we are ie

bizarre inc – playing with knives

quadrophonia – quadrophonia